Signs That I am Losing My Mind

1. In a moment of weakness several weeks ago, I succumbed to Kate's fierce and persistent declarations that she wanted needed purple fairy curtains with a pink butterfly segment at the bottom. They are the ugliest curtains I have ever made. Note that they are not pictured here. Not only are they unsightly, but I have only completed one panel. And the curtain rod is still on Kate's floor. I am the queen of unfinished projects.

I also somehow ended up with fabric to make dresses for both girls.

2. Despite currently owning only a 2 person tent, I booked us (Tim, me, Kate, Claire, and Luke. At last check, this is 5 people) a campground at Lake Tahoe for Sunday night. We have never camped with children. Tim and I have not camped for approximately 10 years. The adults own proper camping gear, but the girls' sleeping bags have fairy and princess decorations and light up when the bags move. I am certain that they will be useless and ineffective in the much-cooler-than-we-are-used-to mountain air of the Sierra Nevadas. The boy one has no sleeping bag, and would be unlikely to nest in one if he did. I also fear that the boy one will be unlikely to sleep at all given the lack of containment device he knows as his crib.

3. We leave in 1.5 days. I have not packed more than shirts and shorts for myself, and have only managed to gather Kate's pajamas for the kids. We will be gone for 3 weeks, in weather that I presume will be vastly different than our current 110* highs/90* lows. We are all bound to be stunned by the cold that 55* mornings will bring.

4. I am blogging instead of packing.

The Pinky Stinger...

Big sister Claire is having fun teaching her little brother. She informed me a few minutes ago that "Luke likes to touch tongues." What? She then proceeded to demonstrate in the pictures above.

Oh, the pinky stinger... The girls were treated to new Barbie doll clothes this morning. They had to wait until after nap to open them. As the dad I got to cut loose the 200 little plastic connectors holding the three outfits to the cardboard container. Once released, the girls took to dressing their barbies in the new outfits. Any woman or parent probably remembers the most painful part of dressing a barbie is getting the hands through the sleeves. Designing a kids doll with a thumb and pinkie finger to snag in loose threads has caused millions of lost man hours over the decades of Barbies existence.

3-year old Claire was struggling getting Barbies hand through the new outfit.

4-year old Kate says to Claire: "Her pinky finger is stuck!"

3-year old Claire brings Barbie to Dad exclaiming "Her pinky stinger is f***ed!"

What?

"Her pinky finger is stuck!"

Love ya Claire.

Celebrating Freedom

My sister, Jessica, and her family joined us for the 4th of July weekend. It has been more than a year since she was here, and we were glad they were the ones making the long and mentally agonizing drive to be spending time all together, cultivating such relationships that only blood relatives can enjoy.

The weekend was fraught with shenanigans.

Despite Tim's continual, and insistent, marshmallow-roasting instructions, a semi-intoxicated Jessica managed to light her marshmallow on fire at least 8 times. My stove. It might never recover.

One evening, after watching the Star Trek movie (surprisingly good! Yes, I am aware that I am freakishly enamored with sci-fi!) Jess and I spent an excessive amount of time "evening out" the all-American chocolate cake we had purchased at Costco for the weekend. In our defense, it looked much more uniform when we were done.

The children (read: Kate and McLaren) agreed to watch a movie other than Chicken Run (see previous post), which turned out to be Enchanted. During the ballroom dancing scene, Kate and Tempie re-enacted the frolicking as seen through their eyes.

We were all relieved to see that the girls were getting along, especially after it was determined that Lucy was keen to establish her superiority over Luke. The first time it happened, we thought it was clumsiness. Lucy and Luke were casually walking along the edge of the pool, and all parents were focused on the children in the water. Suddenly Luke splashed in, unexpectedly, by the look on his face and the wailing that ensued. Mike and I joked that Lucy pushed him in. Not hours later, however, Jessica caught her red-handed. Lucy was indeed pushing Luke down, attempting (hopefully minor) bodily injury. All weekend, every adult kept the blue-eyed beauty under close observation for more blatant physical violations against her younger cousin.

After movie night, it was time for fireworks. There were a few tears (Tempie), some shrieking (Lucy, who LOVED the whole production), and lots of hands over ears (Kate and Claire). As for Luke, he was mostly wide-eyed throughout the whole event, unclear what it was we were trying to accomplish.

I am so ready for this. Bring it.

Luke's first exposure to fireworks. He is clearly stunned by our lack of grandeur, and yet also concerned by his father's apparent role in purposely lighting things on fire.

The whole family, minus Tim, the pyrotechnician, as they sit in awe of the minuscule sparks and illuminations cast by our paltry firework show. The children still managed to spend most of the time covering their ears and appearing alarmed.

Casual Conversations

Claire: "I think we'll have to get a new car."

Tim: "Why's that, Claire?"

Claire: "Because this car's all dirty."

~~~

Kate: "Mom, I can't wait till we move."

Me: "Why? I like our house. Don't you like it?"

Kate: "Yeah. But I want a house with a fireplace."

~~~

Claire: "I'm playing with Tempie 'cause I love Tempie super super much."

~~~

Claire: [breakfast time, looking at me expectantly] "I wanna have chocolate cake."

~~~

On the subject of movie night...

Claire: "Kate, are you ever gonna like Chicken Run?"

Kate: "No. I don't like the mean lady who makes chicken pie."

Claire: "Tim, hear this! Chicken pie! Chicken pie! Chicken pie!"

Kate, somewhat hysterical: "No, Claire! Don't say that!"

Incidentally, they didn't watch Chicken Run for movie night.

Tim's Second Calling

I begrudgingly acknowledge that my husband is the most talented photographer in our family.

Wearing Out the Children

The girls demanded eggs, sunny-side-up, this morning. Luke, unable to intelligibly express his desire for food, figured he'd forage for himself. Off of Kate's plate that was sitting unattended on the table.

Uhhhh, SOMEone dropped an egg on the floor, Mama.

"Uh-oh! Uh-oh!"

Fffffttttt. It wasn't ME.

As it turns out, months of waking earlier than the mutually*-agreed-upon time of 7am finally took its toll on Kate.

After generously offering to make our bed, I found her sound asleep buried in pillows at 11am, explaining why previous requests for her to come swimming had gone unheeded.


Meanwhile, the two younger siblings were outside enjoying the "cool" morning (98*).

*Her father and I both recognize this as an acceptable wake time. Evidently, she was not party to this arrangement.

Role-Playing

Observed post-lunch today: Kate taking Claire's phone order for pizza, while a rogue waiter unsuccessfully tries to climb the "counter".

"Hello, this is Pizza Hut. How may I help you?" Waitress Kate is nothing if not polite and helpful.

"Um, yes. I would like a pizza with pepperoni and olives and pineapple, please." Evidently, we order the same pizza often enough that Claire has memorized its toppings.

Dissatisfied with the speed of service, customer Claire rushes the counter in an attempt to precipitate its delivery. Note that waitress Kate has not yet hung up the phone.

Aforementioned waiter tries to make a quick phone call of his own, while the chef prepares the pizza.

Customer Claire inexplicably ends up with an apple and a lemon; it is unclear whether this was intentional on the part of Pizza Hut, or if orders were botched.

Mum! Mum!

Translation, from Luke-speak: Vroom! Vroom! It's his favorite phrase, used when discussing the passing garbage truck, or when contemplating use of the vacuum cleaner.

The boy loves his vacuums.

He also loves his cat. Regretfully, the cat does not return the love, aside from the occasional, and oft unprovoked attack on the poor boy.

Cars have not yet become an obsession for him, but I sense us heading in that direction.

He has almost mastered the art of pull-and-release cars, of which I sadly cannot find any more. Do they call them something else? They are just so much more amusing than your standard matchbox car.

Happy Father's Day, Father!*

A short interview with the children, on their favorite subject: Dad.

1. How old is Daddy?
Kate: Um, 40.
Claire: 40.
Luke: Da!
Actual answer: 40.

2. How old are you?
Kate: Um, 4. And a half.
Claire: 3.
Luke: suh-suh.

3. What is Daddy's favorite food?
Kate: Um, um, um, it's supposed to be....I know what it is. It's....hmmm. Beans in a pot with sausage and he also likes rice with beans.
Claire: Grapes.
Luke: Uh dee duh dah deh.
Actual answer: red beans and rice. And steak.

4. What is Daddy's favorite color?
Kate: I don't know. Maybe black.
Claire: I think green.
Luke: Nuh dah.
Actual answer: blue?

5. What does Daddy like to drink?
Kate: Soda.
Claire: Coffee.
Luke: Nun dah dah.
Actual answer: Jack Daniels.

6. What does Daddy like to do when he's not working?
Kate: Play with us.
Claire: Uh, play and stay home.
Luke: Waaaaaah, ahhhh aaaaah!
Actual answer: Play with the kids.

7. What does Daddy do for work?
Kate: Um, he talks to a lot of people.
Claire: Drives.
Luke: Don neh dun.
Actual answer: flies the A-10.

8. What is Daddy's favorite song?
Kate: Three Blind Mice.
Claire: Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.
Luke: Plb buh duh.
Actual answer: Can't Take My Eyes Off of You (Franki Valli).

9. Does Daddy have any brothers or sisters?
Kate: He has a lot of brothers and one sister.
Claire: Us.
Luke: Down nah dah.
Actual answer: 2 brothers and 1 sister.

10. What is his favorite thing in the world?
Kate: A-10s!
Claire: Going to work.
Luke: Eeeh aah!
Actual answer: Jen.

*A note of thanks to Carrie and Dorothy for unwittingly sharing this idea with me.

Fighting over the vacuum, and other summer fun

This morning Kate was up early. We spent a little time reading her new Kids' World Atlas. She was obsessed with the komodo dragon. She asked me where it lived, and I told her: Indonesia. "Donesia?" she asked. "IN-do-ne-sia," I enunciated. "Donesia," she said, confident that she finally had it right.

She LOVES to read. She can read quite a few words, although she gets easily frustrated when we try to prod her along with what she doesn't already know.

Fun with the mister today.

Pouring water on her little brother's head, like any good big sister would do.

Learning how to get what he wants.

"I want to vacuum." "NO, I want to vacuum!" [can you hear my contented sigh from where you are?]

Operation: Pigeon

We have a bird problem here. Starbuck is useless in helping combat them. He's aggressive inside, but a weenie when outside, faced with actual birds. We decided to wait until we reached record-breaking temperatures to apply our new bird spikes, so as to maximize the discomfort involved. The children didn't mind so much, as their job was to stay inside and provide guidance and moral support. And to tell us which tools to use.

Future dentist.

Dad, you totally need to use this one.

Operation: pigeon is an initial success! There is still room for that pesky mockingbird to land on the owl's ear, so we'll have to wait to declare complete victory.

Afterward, we swam. Because we're setting records for heat here. Also, the boy one looks so stinkin' cute in his swim gear.

With a cough-cough here, and a bark-bark there

This is the second trip in a row where Luke has come down with croup either on the trip or on the way home. He had a shot of steroids on Wednesday, but sounded bad enough last night that I "slept" in his room with him. Needless to say, we are both exhausted and he has another appointment today. Claire also has croup, but seems to be responding better to the meds.

Our trip to Tucson was a fun one, though - we arrived on Friday night, shortly before my dad did, and spent three days enjoying excellent food, consuming copious amounts of wine, and eating cake in celebration of Tempie's 3rd birthday and my sister's thirtysomethingth birthday. We also got to see our neighbors, the Humphreys, from when we lived in Tucson.

Luke tries to steal cake from the birthday girl. She is not amused.

He thinks he has scored the jackpot: watermelon and goldfish crackers at his level. I didn't see him with an empty hand for the duration of the party.

Kate gives Grampa a kiss.

Kate and Luke playing with Olivia and Isaac.

The best of the approximately 47 photos we took of the children lined up in order of age.

The Wizard of Oz

Tim is reading The Wizard of Oz to the girls. They love it. I love that they love it. I grew up reading all the books and loving them (except I don't think I ever read the first one, relying instead on the movie, which is very different than the book). I think Tim was skeptical of my love of these books. But now I believe he is as excited to read to them as they are to hear the story. I think he may be slightly disappointed when I sneak in a chapter to them, so that he doesn't get to read it.

Ready to BBQ.

Making bread with Grandma.

Enjoying her gooey hands.

Taking a walk with Grandma.

They love shoulder rides.

Tim's parents visited last week from Oregon. We had a great time with them, swimming, making bread, and taking walks in the amazingly cool spring weather. On Friday we leave for Tucson to visit my sister and her family for Tempie's 3rd birthday. This year, May is for family!

Mostly, it's the Books

And the internet, or lack of it. A few weeks ago, something went wonky with our wi-fi, and I had no internet for several days. At first I panicked. No internet? What was I to do?

The house suddenly got cleaner, the food more elaborate (except for the recipes I always pull off the 'net), and I started reading again. Then, I got hooked on books and it was back to toys everywhere and fishsticks for dinner. I still didn't get back online, for the most part. It's been a long time since I've read like that, but in the past few weeks, I've read several excellent books: The Girl With the Dragon Tatoo, Child 44, and The Likeness.

On Tuesday night, I got home from a coffee at 10pm, and Kate was crying. She hurt her elbow while wrestling earlier in the evening, and she had just woken up because it still hurt. I tried sleeping next to her, but she couldn't fall back asleep for more than a few minutes before waking up again crying. So, at 11pm, we went to the ER. Along with everyone else. She had 3 x-rays, to rule out broken bones, and when the PA saw us around 2:30am, he confirmed nursemaid's elbow, which is the radius dislocating from the socket. Kate has likely had this several times before, but it has always fixed itself. This time it didn't and we had to get a doctor's help. He showed me how to fix it, so that if it happens again, I can hopefully pop it back in at home.

So this week has been sort of wacky, with lack of sleep and trying to get back to a general feeling of liveliness. Tim's family arrived last night for the next week or so, and we look forward to spending some time with his parents next week, after they are done with the class they are taking.

I can't promise that I will be writing again in the next few days, but it could happen. Except I just got The Girl Who Played With Fire, so . . .

I think she can read

Over the past several days, Kate has pulled out random books...and read them to us. The first one was a story from her brand new Highlights magazine, one which no one had read to her yet. She gets stuck on multi-syllabic words, but I think she can read. My baby's growing up.